Can anybody best me?

[William]

Now I've heard some tall tails for sure, remind me to say fer away from y'all, a' scard stiff.

LOL!

[Hanshi]

I might should have mentioned that my left hand can kill a man; and I'm scared of that right sob, myself!

[Cranbrook]

     "I have got the roughest racing horse, the prettiest sister, the surest rifle, and the ugliest dog in the district. I'm the savagest critter you ever did see. My father can whip any man in Kentucky, and I can lick my father. I can out-speak any man on this floor, and give him two hours start. I can run faster, dive deeper, stay longer under, and come out drier, than any chap this side the big Swamp.

[beezlebob]

I'm so tough the skunks and porquepines stay away from me.

[Dogshirt]

I'm so bad, even I won't talk to me before I've had my coffee!

[Red Badger]

We were talking tough not bad....   

[Newtire]

I'm so bad, if I hit you, you'd starve to death rollin'.

[Hanshi]

Well, I'm tough and ruthless; my daddy was rough and toothless.

[Hanshi]

And furthermore, when my feet first hit the floor in the morning, Satan rubs his brow and says "Oh, Hell; Tommy's up". 

I got surrounded once, by 7 gangbangers carrying tire tools.  When the ambulances,  cops, etc, show up and everything is settled, the cop says that's a nasty cut on your head and needs looking at by one of the paramedics.  I explained that I smacked my head pretty hard on the bumper as I was helping load the last gang member in the hearse. 

[Cranbrook]

I'm so tough that I haven't had a match since Superman died!

The last surgery I went in for, the doctor had to buy special diamond edged scalpels!

I was once captured by a tribe of cannibal's.  They let me go after I had simmered in their pot for 3 whole days and they still couldn't sink a fork in me!

[old salt]

I am so tough that I look death in the face and spit in his eye, I ride a grizzly bear for fun and use a 6 ft. use a  ratter for a whip to case twister out of my area,

[Red Badger]

I'm so tough I can read all the ridiculous posts in this thread and still smile... 

[Hanshi]

Ridiculous?  Everything I posted is the truth. 

[Watauga]

  I have been Married to a Redhead for 42 years...........

[pilgrim]

  I have been Married to a Redhead for 42 years...........

       compared to this,             ALL you other guys are WHIMPS!