Stupid Animal Stories

[hrayton]

When I was a kid, I got a little spoiled, my folks were teachers, and after we moved back to Illinois, they made a point of packing us up every summer to go vacation west. We'd tent camp our way across the Dakotas, until we hit Yellowstone, and we'd set up for a couple of weeks for camping, sightseeing, fishing, and just generally camping with the same group of people every year. The fishing was the best part, but the sightseeing was fun, just taking in the outdoors, and sleeping out at night and hearing the wind through the lodgepoles was pretty awesome too. But back to the topic at hand, stupid animal stories.

     One time, some people in a camper in a site next to us, well, they showed up in the campground, and basically began to unpack a simpler version of home on wheels, these people camped with so much stuff, it was like they weren't camping at all. The missus, strung a laundry line from the side of their camper to one of the lodgepole pines.....right across a game trail. That night a big old bull moose with a full rack came through, and got his horns all tangled up in that laundry line! You have never heard such a ruckus! Bellowing, and banging occurred as he tried to free his horns, and literally rocked that camper on its springs, finally the line snapped and all 2 tons of him went bellowing off into the woods....the funny part was watching the people the next morning follow his trail into the woods as they collected their swimming towels, clothing, and other things that had been hanging on the line...they left that day, the side of the camper was all smashed up...I have often wondered what they told their insurance company. Moral: DON'T string your laundry line(if you GOTTA have one) across a game trail.

Stupid story two, involves a trip through Hayden Valley at sunset to watch the animals coming down from the tree line for the evening to drink at the river...There are a lot of Buffalo in Yellowstone, and sometimes you don't see them for days, but every so often they gather in a large herd in Hayden Valley and the land is black with them...it is an awesome sight and one that should be respected...but we were driving through one night/late afternoon, and traffic was just stopped, the road was jammed with cars as people got out to take pictures. Now, you're not gonna believe this, but that afternoon, I watched a French tourist get out of his rental car, holding two toddlers by the hand, he walked right up to one of the biggest bulls I have ever seen, reached down, and lifted his toddlers onto its back....he took about six steps back, took their picture, walked back up to the bull, got them down, and then walked back to his car, and simply drove away. We held our breath the entire time....I have NEVER seen something like that happen either before or since, but that man was lucky not to have suffered death, injury and tragedy beyond all measure. Moral: He was lucky but DON'T put your children on the back of a wild animal to take their picture!

Stupid Story number three, involves a man taking his Black Lab on a walk through an active geyser basin, with signs posted every three feet saying NO DOGS....now, some of those pools are several hundred degrees, there are stories of trappers boiling meat for dinner in a geyser, hot spring.....and labs are water dogs....so....what do you think happened? The dog was off his leash no less. You guessed it, the dog jumped right into a four hundred degree pool of water.....the man.....well, he jumped in after the dog......and his friend jumped right in after him.....the second man lived with 3rd degree burns over 90 percent of his body....the first man and the dog......well, lets just say that they didn't. The MORAL: If all of your friends jumped off a cliff....*sigh* DON'T take your leashless water dog to a geyser basin.

[Razor]

Good reading, thanks..
It's AMAZING what folks will do, ain't it ?   
Sure hope some of the other fellers will contribute.

[flintboomer]

Dogs aren't very smart despite what some of their owners think. Sometimes I wonder about people too.

The streams and rivers here can be pretty fast and cold and it is not unusual to hear about someone jumping in to save their dog. The dog usually gets out somewhere downstream. The owner doesn't and their body is found a few days or weeks later somewhere downstream.

[graybear]

When we were down to Gatlinburg,TN. this Spring, the sow bears were out with their cubs, munching the fresh greenery. While we were driving thru the National Forest, we came came across folks with no clue of what a sow could do if she felt her cub(s) were threatened. One spot the sow was about 6 ft. uphill from the road and the cub was about 3 ft. past the sow. People were in the lane closest to the sow taking pictures, talking, and calling to people on the other side of the road telling them to come over to get better pictures. At another spot, the sow chased the cub up a tree because of all the people, and was feeding 30-40 yards away from the cub, about 25 yards down the mountainside from the road. People were trying to get close to the cub, which had draped itself along a branch, so they could get a close up view. I'm talking probably 40+ adults and I have no idea how many kids. Me, the first time, I took a picture from my car while I was waiting for the people to clear the road, and the second I was over towards momma and used telephoto to get a picture of the cub. Some of the people were about !0 yards from the cub. I saw the same thing at other spots. I swear, with some folk, if brains were dynamite, they wouldn't be able to blows their nose.

[voyageur1688]

  Some people are so stupid that they only keep breathing by pure luck.
  One incident I remember from when I was a kid was not as dumb as these but was hilarious just the same, yet sad in another.
  When I was a kid a friend of the family was having bear problems and went out to dispatch the problem, which he quickly did within 250 yards of his home, using all the ammo he had with him. Problem was, said bear was not a boar but was a sow with a cub. Lacking more ammo, he did not have the heart to let the cub starve and die alone so he took it home until he could get to town for more ammo. Well, his kids and wife fell instantly in love with it and he ended up not shooting it at that time as he had planned to. His oldest son made a big chain collar for it and used a tow chain as a leash for the cub when it started getting bigger. He eventually started taking it for walks with him and even taking it for walks into town. It was extremely funny watching people--especially tourists dive into any car or door (home or business--it didnt matter)that was near them when they realized it WAS a REAL LIVE BEAR on that chain leash. Eventually Randy had the bear tear the seat out of his pants and leave him needing several stitches on his posterior, when he wouldnt let it go and eat everybodies food at the local Dairy Queens picnic tables. Randy got stitches and the bear ended up being put down which is sad but there was no choice.
Another was a woodchuck that  decided it wanted to warm itself on the engine in my brothers 71 Ford Torino which my brother had just put a bigger engine in so there was not much room under the hood. My brother went out hunting and while they were gone the chuck found the warmth of the engine inviting. When he drove the 10 miles back home he started to hear this scratching sound under the hood and figured it was a branch caught under the car. and continued the drive home. By the time he got home the scratching was getting pretty frantic and didnt stop when he turned the car off.  He opened the hood and there on top of the aircleaner which only cleared the hood by about 1 1/2 inches was the woodchuck.  He sat there forr about 3 seconds doing the 10 step boogie then flew off it like he was shot out of a cannon--right at my brother. Dont know which was more startled --the woodchuck or my brother.After the initial collision the wood chuck flew westward as my brother flew eastward--both under their own power. neither was hurt but both were very surprised.
Voy

[gordy]

        The story if the man that put his kids on the back of the bull bison , reminded me of a time several yeas ago when when most small towns and villages had an open dumpsite near town . One such dump was located near
'Indian Lake Village" in upstate N.Y. People would drive to the dump at night to watch the bears feed on the garbage . Now , there was nothing wrong as long as folks stayed in their vehicles , but there were many times some non-native folks would take their toddlers and put them on the ground in front of a bear and step back and take a flash photo of the kids just a few feet from the bear . Ignorance is bliss !!! 

[BRIAR]

I RECKON COMMON SENSE JUST AINT ALL THAT COMMON THESE DAYS.

[Red Badger]

I RECKON COMMON SENSE JUST AINT ALL THAT COMMON THESE DAYS.

back in the 60's my grandfather used to tell me "common sense isn't..." He said he learned the saying from his Great grandfather...